does symmetry on fast moves match anyone else's fill log?

i've been keeping a little csv of my own fills for a couple months, mostly because i wanted features for a model and ended up just staring at the raw rows instead. my chasing-up fills feel worse than my dumping-out fills, pretty consistently. so that research piece saying the two sides cost about the same on a fast second kind of bugged me. i get that they measured the quote itself under matched conditions and my log is just me, small sample, no control for anything. but if the quote is symmetric and my results aren't, then the asymmetry is me, which is a weirder thing to accept than i expected. maybe i just click faster when i'm scared.